George Burns

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.  - George Burns

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair. - George Burns

There will always be a battle between the sexes because men and women want different things. Men want women and women want men. - George Burns

Retirement at 65 is ridiculous. When I was 65, I still had pimples. - George Burns